How Long Until This Is Banned? 10 - 9 - 8. . .

"SteveLehto" (stevelehto)
08/19/2015 at 08:35 • Filed to: None

Here’s an idea that is so fraught with idiocy I am startled that TWO different people - I mean “companies” - have come up with it at the same time. Flame throwers for “consumer” use.

Yes, we all remember the good old-fashioned flamethrowers. Bulky and unweildy, our brave soldiers used them in some of the ugliest fighting in World War II. Remember Saving Private Ryan ?

I’m not sure that a lot of those returning soldiers came home and said, “Gee, I wish I could get my hands on a flame thrower today.” But some enterprising fellows have built flamethrowers you can buy. Portable and apparently easy to use. Hey, they run on gasoline.

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Well, let’s see. Who will ban this first? The EPA, the Consumer Product Safety Commission, or just every government body capable of passing laws? Or will they be put out of business by the avalanche of lawsuits which will arise from what is apparently a dangerous product?

I suggest we turn this into a game. I can’t imagine this will take that long.

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DISCUSSION (79)

georgechristensen > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 08:40

It’s the perfect device for clearing snow from your driveway.

SteveLehto > georgechristensen
08/19/2015 at 08:42

I might buy one for making toast in the morning.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 08:46

George Carlin’s opinion

Snuze: Needs another Swede > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 08:48

But think of the practical applications here... Say you’re having a big party, do you want to really stand outside by the grill all day, doing what, 8, 10 burgers at a time? Lay those babies out on the driveway and BAM! 30 seconds and you can cook 100 burgers, 100 hot dogs, 100 brats, the neighbors cat. Then you can get back to socializing and enjoying your party!

SteveLehto > Snuze: Needs another Swede
08/19/2015 at 08:49

It’s only a matter of time (hours?) before two idiots get a pair and start jousting with them. It will make great youtube footage but in the end, they both lose.

Wobbles the Mind > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 08:51

Manliest candlelight dinner ever. Show her you’re romantic and dangerous!

SteveLehto > Wobbles the Mind
08/19/2015 at 08:52

Now that you mention it, there is something oddly erotic about this device.

vondon302 > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 08:53

Let’s be honest now don’t you want one. I know i do ! I’d love to see my neighbors face when i clear my snow off the driveway.

Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2 > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
08/19/2015 at 08:53

Was about to post this.

SteveLehto > vondon302
08/19/2015 at 08:54

It’s never ME I worry about. It’s the children. THINK OF THE CHILDREN!

Wobbles the Mind > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 08:54

I’m sure many will end up with a fire in their loins.

Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2 > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 08:54

Wow, didn’t think those would ever make it to the market. I’m excited. I want the NRA to get involved and try to support the manufacturers and owners.

SteveLehto > Wobbles the Mind
08/19/2015 at 08:55

A burning sensation?

Snuze: Needs another Swede > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 08:55

Well I’ve already got my order in, just trying to find a jousting partner now. And because horses are scared of fire, I’m going to do it off a dirt bike.

Brian > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
08/19/2015 at 08:56

Awesome find! RIP George. The greatest.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 08:56

Shit, better buy one now while they’re still available.

SteveLehto > Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2
08/19/2015 at 08:56

This is prescisely what we used to vanquish the Redcoats. I’m pretty sure.

SteveLehto > Snuze: Needs another Swede
08/19/2015 at 08:56

Indoors, I hope.

SteveLehto > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie
08/19/2015 at 08:57

Seriously. These will not be on the market long.

Brian > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 08:57

I’m a big Shark Tank fan. Finish the joke yourselves.

Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2 > Wobbles the Mind
08/19/2015 at 08:58

“I only regret that I have but one recommendation to give for this comment”

- Chuck (2015)

Wobbles the Mind > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 08:59

A real weinie roast! I’ll see myself out...

pip bip - choose Corrour > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 08:59

do what the south africans did and attach them to the underneath of your car

;)

DoYouEvenShift > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:00

Meh. Chainsaws are still legal. No biggie

SteveLehto > Brian
08/19/2015 at 09:01

“You’re dead to me.”

TheRealBicycleBuck > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:01

It’s the natural progression of the lowly weed torch . Evolution in action!

Kinja'd!!!

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:01

Here’s a photo of George Washington getting it done.

Kinja'd!!!

Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2 > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:02

Kinja'd!!!

???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Kinja'd!!!

SteveLehto > DoYouEvenShift
08/19/2015 at 09:02

Chainsaws are precision instruments. They don’t spray their chains 30 feet. At least most of the time.

vondon302 > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:02

Stop drop and roll timmy!

Berang > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:05

I wonder if I can safely use it simultaneously with this:

http://www.collectorsweekly.com/stories/140694…

SteveLehto > Berang
08/19/2015 at 09:06

Topless women jousting on those with the flamethrowers. It’s TV GOLD!

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:06

Their being legal is nothing new. In fact, I’ve got a little short-range kerosene flamethrower for weed-burning that dates from the 50s or 60s. Anything that bans a flamethrower would probably by implication ban a lot of industrial devices that are similar, such as weed torches and roofing torches. I truly don’t believe this is an issue - not only is a flamethrower with any range hideously expensive (making it a toy of the wealthy), but it’s outranged in practical terms by almost any handgun. Anybody who gets the vapors over the idea of somebody going on a flamethrower rampage (or burning his house down and getting any kind of claim paid) needs their meds checked.

Agrajag > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:09

Prometheus: I give you the gift of fire. Now don’t be stupid.

Man: No promises.

SteveLehto > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
08/19/2015 at 09:10

If you saw the video, unbburned gas spilled out and it also appeared to be fairly sloppy. Within a few weeks of these things being on sale, users will 1) burn themselves, 2) burn others, 3) burn down things they didn’t set out to and 4) piss off all kinds of neighbors who will be scared that any of the foregoing is going to happen to them or their children.

In the hands of the wrong person, these things are dangerous. More so than the typical weed torch. But hey, I could be wrong. Maybe these things will be the rage by the next 4th of July.

SteveLehto > Agrajag
08/19/2015 at 09:11

Man (on fire as he speaks): “Don’t be what now?”

BigBlock440 > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:13

They’d make quick work of a wasp nest. Much safer than using an aerosol can too.

Snuze: Needs another Swede > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:13

I’m not so sure that I’d describe a chainsaw as a precision instrument...

SteveLehto > BigBlock440
08/19/2015 at 09:13

It would make quick work of the tree the nest was in, too. Doesn’t seem like a terribly precision device.

Snuze: Needs another Swede > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:14

Well, I was just talking to someone about shooting my pellet gun in my apartment. Seems like a logical progression.

SteveLehto > Snuze: Needs another Swede
08/19/2015 at 09:14

You need to see one in the hands of a master. My brother works a chainsaw like Hendrix worked his Strat. A real thing of artistry.

Patrick Nichols > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:21

every government body capable of passing laws

The government that has a hard enough time banning bath salts is definitely incapable of banning these.

Snuze: Needs another Swede > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:21

Good point, I’ve seen some of those chainsaw carving demos, they are pretty wild.

Maybe there’s hope for precision flame thrower sculpting.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:24

The kerosene one I have is more of a handheld wand, and spitting excess unburned fuel is an asset to burning weeds/etc. so before the proliferation of propane, it was accepted that in the greatest napalmic traditions you’d fuel whatever you were trying to burn. In other words, before the modern use of propane, we’ve actually been here before. Also, mil-surplus ones have been available (if in limited numbers) for years. Of course, that doesn’t mean that in the modern age, we aren’t risking internet hipsters with no arms discipline getting these for a “cool video” with their trust fund. Still way less dangerous than mil-surplus ones that project 30 feet and operate at multiple thousand psi.

BigBlock440 > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:30

The tree will grow back, or alternatively, you didn’t really want that tree anyway.

DoYouEvenShift > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:30

Haha! I watched a Canadian guy use one with the skill of a surgeon. Made a nice bear statue out of a log.

Watching my friends dad use one, well, it would make leather face run for safety.

Like everything else, its only as safe as the user I guess.

SteveLehto > Patrick Nichols
08/19/2015 at 09:32

Want to bet?

SteveLehto > BigBlock440
08/19/2015 at 09:33

The tree had it comin’.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2
08/19/2015 at 09:42

BULLSHIT

StingrayJake > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:44

ATF should be awfully interested.

I think it’s kind of funny because rigging something like that up to run off of propane is pretty common in farming. Burning off crop stubble with a controlled burn is a normal practice and a lot of it is done with homemade flame throwers.

SteveLehto > StingrayJake
08/19/2015 at 09:45

Which seems a heck of a lot safer than this thing. I’d trust a farmer with a propane burner much more than a teenager with one of these.

Patrick Nichols > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:47

I’ll bet a custom woodburning picture (something I just started doing ) of your choice on “bankruptcy by lawsuit” before government law banning it for a copy of one of your books.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Snuze: Needs another Swede
08/19/2015 at 09:52

Sculpting an ice sculpture with the flamethrower.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:53

Personally, I’m a huge fan of evolution being allowed to run its course. If you were a personal injury attorney, you’d probably like these too.

StingrayJake > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 09:53

True, but that doesn’t mean a teenager can’t get his hands on the appropriate parts to build his own. In fact I think teenage boys spend most of their days devising ways to create destructive devices. I know I did (never got a chance to see what my styrofoam/gasoline puddy would do).

SteveLehto > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie
08/19/2015 at 09:53

Or a product liability attorney. The lawsuits will be massive and expensive.

MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 10:16

This is how we start the camp fires at our big event down in Ohio every summer.

don’t take away our fun!

SteveLehto > MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner
08/19/2015 at 10:16

A jerry can and a lighter can do it just as well.

MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 10:21

Yeah but that’s no where near as fun.

And ours are very well controlled and used by volunteer fireman so it’s incredibly safe. Giant water buckets and hoses are always on hand as well.

Sneaky Pete > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 10:21

They both lose, but the gene pool wins. I’m all for it.

Opposite Locksmith > Snuze: Needs another Swede
08/19/2015 at 10:21

Yes you were!

SteveLehto > Sneaky Pete
08/19/2015 at 10:24

Sadly, they almost always harm innocent third parties before they go.

MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 10:27

Here’s a couple in use:

Kinja'd!!!

All kinds of fun. (I blurred their faces, they didn’t melt off from the flames lol)

ly2v8-Brian > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 10:53

Gotta have someway to kill spiders.

ly2v8-Brian > georgechristensen
08/19/2015 at 10:54

Guy in ND went to jail for doing that.

Tapas > SteveLehto
08/19/2015 at 10:55

The gubbbamint might ban it soon? Well that will just increase their sales like crazy!

Obama never wanted to take guns away, yet he became the best gun salesman in recent history.

Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2 > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
08/19/2015 at 10:57

I’m serious. It was the first thing that popped into my head. Love Carlin, especially the early stuff. I might be 20, but I know the 7 words.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2
08/19/2015 at 11:04

you’re a good man. Keep Carlin in your mind... the man may have been a comedian, but he was a wicked brilliant philosopher

Chuck 2(O=[][]=O)2 > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
08/19/2015 at 11:14

Very true. I find a good number comedians actually getting at important issues. But none do it like Carlin. He kept his eyes open and didn’t hold back.

BigBlock440 > StingrayJake
08/19/2015 at 11:29

It just lights up easy and burns with a lot of black smoke, like styrofoam. Nothing too exciting, but it does burn for quite some time.

StingrayJake > BigBlock440
08/19/2015 at 11:38

Kind of anticlimactic after what some of my fellow destructive teenagers had told me about it.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > BigBlock440
08/19/2015 at 12:42

Yeah, I was expecting waaaaay more fire.